This may be the first day, in what seems like forever (time is uneding in the dark and reality skewed), that I have actually smiled and meant it. Today, December 22, 2016, I smiled!

Depression hits me out of nowhere sometimes and it seems that no matter what I do, I can't shake it, so through the motions, I go.

Today, those motions felt more powerful, today those motions weren't so difficult...today, I smiled and I meant it.

Yesterday, while out on a lunch date with my sweetheart, I received a phone call from a friend who does not often call on the phone. I felt I needed to take it even though I was enjoying some rare time with my busy husband. I answered the call to hear her say that she was just thinking about me and wanted to call.

I took the opportunity to share a prayer request, later followed by a text message telling her I had been struggling and her phone call came at the perfect time. 

As is the case, most times, I find that once I speak the darkness into the light and share with others who will lift me up in prayer, the power it has over me is broken. As I shared, I could already feel the weight lifting. Depression wants to isolate me and too often, I let it.

Yes, going through the motions helped, but ultimately, for me, speaking it out loud to others who come in agreement before for the Lord in the name of Jesus breaks every chain that is bound in me.

Thank you Lord.

Can I encourage you, during this season of Joy, that often times feels anything but, do not be tempted to isolate yourself, but allow others to stand alongside you in prayer. You may find that it eases the load and may allow you to see the light and promise to come.

Joyful Christmas and I love you in the Lord, Mia

In case you haven't noticed, I love to hike. I love to get outdoors in the wee hours and move. That's fun for me. That's the easy part. 

What is not as fun for me is going to the gym...doing my reps and sets of squats, push ups, crunches, planks, curls etc.

If I don't keep my core strong, I ache all over, my back hurts and I am all out of whack.....so, typically after my time hiking up a mountain, I head down and I go to the gym, I do the work.

Guess what, That's kinda like life and ministry. Fellowship with others as Christ has called us to do can be the fun part, but it's the time in the Word that keeps our core strong, without that time and the strengthening of our spiritual muscles, we become weak, we limp and we walk hesitantly.

So whether in body or spirit, keep your core strong today and work out those muscles, the muscles that no one sees, the muscles that can change your life and your walk AND the lives of those around you. 

Happy Workout! I love you in the Lord!
Mia

Some days I am surprised at which words in the Bible jump out at me. I shouldn't be, but there I was with these two verses from my reading lingering with me throughout the day. Why? I didn't know.....But God!

My day started off pretty well. I went in to work for a couple hours, had a coffee date with a friend and spent some sweet time on my devotions and some beautiful readings from the book of Genesis. And of all that I read, these are the verses that tugged at my heart.

“Some time later Joseph was told, “Your father is ill.” So he took his two sons Manasseh and Ephraim along with him. When Jacob was told, “Your son Joseph has come to you,” Israel (who is Jacob) rallied his strength and sat up on the bed.” ~ Genesis‬ ‭48:1-2‬

What I didn't know, is that by the time evening came, I too would be ill, fighting off my allergies and having difficulty breathing, along with extreme fatigue and weariness of body.

Yet, even with illness creeping at my door, I had things to do. I was scheduled to lead worship that evening at a Celebrate Recovery program. I did  my sound check with my voice nearing a whisper and quite gravely by the end of my rehearsal time. But God....

When the gathering began and the worship music started, we all leaped in together and I got to see God do a miracle. As I began to simply pour my heart out to Him, I felt my voice become stronger than ever, my spirit rose, my fatigue vanished, my breathing improved and my weariness ceased. I got to see Him take it all away. The Worship of the one true God, took my pain away.

Then the Lord reminded me WHY He had me ponder those verses all day. It wasn't just for me. It was for all of us in that place who needed to be reminded to Worship it out. Yes, I was tired when I started, but just as Jacob, upon hearing the good news rallied up his strength, I too, would rally up my strength to worship the one who is worthy and watch my spirit rise to speak His name. 

And that is what worship does. It revives! When we are tired, we worship. When we are hurt, we worship. When we grow weary, we worship. When we feel sick of life struggles, we worship. 

May we be quick in our struggles to sit up, rally all our strength and speak Worship as we fix our eyes an the author and perfecter of our faith.

I love you in the Lord, Mia

I am a grateful believer in Jesus Christ and I struggle. I struggle with Anxiety, trust and depression. I am hopeful because of the struggle, it means I have not given up, It means that I continue to battle. It means that God is not done with me yet. #TheStruggleIsReal

Sunday, I found myself in the battle. I did not know why I was immobile, unable to move, feeling heavy and sad. All I knew is that by 4pm, after a day of isolating myself from my family, their activities and conversations, I could either continue to lay down or I could get up and FIGHT. I chose to fight. I chose to move through the heaviness, to move through the sadness and the weight of my unknown grief.

So, I got on my dancing shoes (my trail-runners) and I hit the mountain. My husband joined me. My husband, who also did not know the source of my sadness, walked with me, he hiked with me and he ran beside me quietly as we hit the trails. And then it happened, around mile three, I could feel the weight lifting and my eyes open to see the light of the new day. Then, by our fifth mile, I felt like a brand new person.

Depression has a way of creeping in unexpectedly, lurking and crouching, hoping that we will continue to lay in it, continue to listen to it and believe what it has to say. Depression thrives on immobility.

​As someone that has struggled with depression most of my life, I know that in the intricacy of how I am made, that I may continue to struggle with it until I am called home to heaven, sometimes alone, sometimes with someone walking beside me, sometimes with some saying (after a few days) "Get up off the couch and move!" I believe that there is truth to what the medical field has said regarding the benefits of exercise to combat depression. There is something in the way that we are designed that allows movement to re-set us and help us to dig ourselves out of the funk that we can be in.

For those of us that struggle occasionally and those that struggle often, know that there is hope. Sometimes, we fight alone, sometimes we fight with someone beside us, sometimes we fight with the aid of medication and sometimes....no, ALL THE TIME we fight with the the Lord at our side.

The Lord says that we can cast all of our cares, even when we don't know what they are, upon him. The Lord, who says that His yoke is easy and His burden light, calls us to take His yoke on us. The Lord will never leave us or forsake us in our sadness or in our struggles. Our Lord, who is able to do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imaging is by our side.

Today, if this is you, fight. Fight to move. Fight to lift your eyes up to the source of life and light. Fight to get up. You got this, because He's got you!

As one who remembers, I love you in the Lord,
​Mia