In the past, I was addicted to cigarettes and I used to drink a lot and smoke pot (and stuff). I rejoice that I have been delivered from those patterns and addictions and celebrate the fact that I am not who I once was. God changed my life! But now as I learn more (and get older), I realize my addiction to food has been the longest, trickiest addiction I have had to battle.

Becoming educated in this area (and I know so little) has changed my mindset, it is changing my life. I have lost 25 pounds since January, 2015 and I still have about 20 to go. Obesity is literally killing us, it was killing me and I was in pain everyday.

The thing with obesity is that it is one of those "addiction" consequences that no one wants to talk about for fear that people may think we are judging people. Well, If I was high on Meth, you would (I hope) confront me because you love me and tell me to stop killing myself. We don't want to point our finger at obesity and plainly put, fat people. It's a tough addiction and probably one that many of us struggle with. I know I do! It's food, we need it, companies need to make money and they need you to come back, so they create a really good product to keep you coming back for more. Hence...the addiction is created!

I am a pretty frugal person, I love resale shops, sales and I pride myself on not spending over $20 for a pair of jeans. Well, when I burst out of all my jeans and my baggy shirts became skin tight, I had a very good excuse for why this was happening and basically lied to myself in saying that it had nothing to do with the ice cream, cookies, fast food and snacks that I was eating.   **Even when I went and spent almost $200 on a pair of jeans that would fit my new "curves" so that I could spare my kids from having to look at my butt-crack hanging out of my pants, I still didn't recognize the problem. **

I could buy new jeans, but I still felt sick. Headaches, migraines, joint and muscle pain were everyday struggles I dealt with. I had a constant flow or Excedrin Migraine, Motrin, Aleve and sleep aids going through my system and always close at hand. I just thought that this was my life and I would always feel this way.

Today, I am on a journey and I have some incredibly inspirational and passionate people that have inspired me as I continue going forward.

Let me say it again, It stated with knowledge (and grace). First from my Lord and Savior and the example that He gave in His Word. I recommend the 21 Day Fast through YouVersion. I wasn't setting out to lose weight or to change my life, I just wanted to spend time with the Lord and through it He revealed to me my strongholds and one of the major struggles I had was food.

The Lord brought people into my life to walk alongside me. Helping my body to heal through JuicePlus+, my sweet friend and coach, Cheri, taught me so much about the body and what it needs to function properly. I started using the fruit and vegetable powders faithfully and saw much of my pain go away. I have now added the Complete Protein to my routine as well. Love it!!

Then I watched the movie Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead. This movie did such a great job of making my health and how my body works understandable and it really motivated me to take it to the next level. I started adding juicing to my daily routine.

With the added juicing, I saw my body completely detox, the inflammation go away and the weight fall off. An interesting bit of info I heard (and don't quote me, but it made sense in my journey and testimony) was that 15% of weight loss is exercise, 35% is what you eat and 50% is detox. I found that so much of what was keeping me fat was that I was poisoning myself with killer toxins through all the crud I was eating and putting in my body. I could go to the gym all I wanted, but the weight never budged because I was full of poison.

So there I was, my relationship with the Lord growing stronger as I began to grasp the importance of keeping the temple of the Holy Spirit healthy SO THAT I can continue to do His work.

But, I still needed help on what to now put in to fuel my body. Learning through various sources on how to eat clean, I am still learning. Thankfully as I detox, my cravings for sugar and food-like products have almost completely diminished, minus that 4 day cruise we just took (remember, I operate under grace.)

I have been inspired and motivated by the recipes of Christina Jordan who has an incredible weight loss story herself. She now coaches and walks alongside people on Facebook and through her very own company Fit Body Weight Loss to help them to live a healthy life. She has dedicated her life to loving people in the Lord and teaching them the joys of healthy living.

I am happy to report that my $200 jeans are too big and I bought a new pair (that I love) for $15!

A friend of mine said "Your skin looks so healthy." My pain is 99% gone. I have more energy than I have had in long time. My massage therapist re-evaluated me yesterday and said my posture and muscle functions have increased positively. I LOVE coffee, but don't drink it regularly anymore because I don't "need" it to get me going in the morning. Now, when I have it, it's a special treat on that rare occasion. I sleep well at night and the insomnia is gone and most nights, I can fall asleep even through my husbands snoring (I love him so!)

Please know, I don't claim to know much except what is going on in my own life and in my own journey. Healthy living is changing my life for the best. I am learning through the journey. God loves me and thinks I am amazing regardless of my weight and the food I put in my body. He loves you the same way, regardless of what you look like and what you eat.

But I do know, that God has entrusted me to care for what He has given and He has entrusted you with the same. So how are you doing?

I operate under grace. Grace has saved my life eternally and grace in my daily walk keeps me going on the days when I fall down, when I slip and when I fail. Today I am staying healthy so that I can continue to do what God has called me to do. Lots of ups and downs, but God is faithful.

I love how people have loved me and gently (and sometimes extremely firmly) spoken truth into my life. I love you in the Lord and pray that He would draw you close to Him and speak whatever truth He needs to into your life.

I pray that He would bring people into your life to walk alongside you to keep you strong in Him and strong in body SO THAT you can continue to do His work joyfully and with a healthy temple.

Please feel free to contact the people I have listed, Cheri and Christina. They are there to help and they know way more I do. Their lives and testimonies have encouraged me and I hope that my journey will do the same for you!

Blessings sweet friends!
Mia

PS, as I was scrubbing the tub, this other thought came to me. Food addiction isn't just for those of us who show it through obesity, it's for all of us who struggle. You can be thin and struggle, but maybe your struggle is silent. It comes down to the fact that we are called to be healthy! #GoodChoices

I LOVE that no matter what state I am in, there is a Celebrate Recovery meeting I can go to..... a place where it is safe to share without having people try to fix me and give me the next best antidote or self help book for my struggles.

Currently I am in Colorado Springs, CO. There are times when I go to CR when the Lord really brings to light a stronghold in my life in a more powerful way than other times. Tonight was one of those nights.

Through a question posed to me by someone sharing their testimony, I thought back to a time when I felt so betrayed and did not want to let it go. This past hurt was connected to my current struggle with trust and anxiety. God revealed this deep rooted bitterness, this place in my heart that was holding me back.

What I realized tonight was simple. I tend to use the excuse that I am an introvert (which is completely true) to cover up the fact that I try to isolate myself from large groups of people because of the anxiety and panic that it brings and therefore isolate myself from fellowship.

If you have ever seen me in public, you might be saying to yourself  "You don't seem to struggle in large groups of people, you go onstage in front of hundreds and thousands of people at a time, You're so talkative and social......The thought of large crowds gives you panic attacks? Social anxiety? You? Never!"

The reality is, "Yes, me." But, the greater reality is that my God is bigger than my fears, bigger than my struggles, bigger than my anxiety. I Celebrate recovery from so much yet I continue to struggle with trust and anxiety, but even though I struggle, I still celebrate victories in these area daily.

Like tonight, as I sat in a circle with a group of strangers in an open share group and shared about my week.....even though I got in the room a little early and rearranged the seats a bit so I wasn't so closed in...it was a victory. The little steps of opening myself up to others regularly so that I don't isolate myself is crucial in my walk with the Lord and the people he sets before me and it is crucial in my relationship with Jesus Christ.

The other week, a women read my display banner at my merch table where is said "Mia Koehne..reflecting the painful beauty of human struggles....." After that she said to me "Mia, you are so pretty, what do you know about struggles?" to which I replied with a testimony and a sharing of my currents struggles. Too pretty? Ha!! Struggles, sin, pain and heartache do not care what we look like on the outside. Too pretty? let me tell you a story...

We all struggle, we all have pain....some of us admit it, some of us hide it and hide it well....some of us walk in the joy of the Lord, so they may be harder to see, but we all have it and we all need to surrender it at the foot of the cross.

This is why I love going to a place where it is safe, where people don't judge me and I learn to not judge others. I love Celebrate Recovery and what it has done in my life and the lives of so many that I have come to love!!

If you have a hurt, a habit or a hang-up, don't hide anymore, reach out. Maybe Celebrate Recovery is the place for you...check it out. www.celebraterecovery.com There is probably one near you!

Here's that banner that I put on display when I do concerts and events. It speaks my heart and the reason I sing.

I just finished speaking and singing at a Women's event in New York. It was amazing. The hospitality, the love and the whole day were so well thought out, prayed over and executed.

I was able to share my story, encourage others to tell theirs, sing, fellowship and pray with several women.

In response, I got to hear many stories of how God was working in their hearts and I love that. People often feel comfortable sharing with me at these events especially since I have just bared my soul in front of the masses and I honor that. I pray and as God directs me I speak truth.

It's a joy to walk along side women in that moment as God peels away layers of hurt, bitterness and shame. Today, because of the boldness the Spirit gave me and probably also a bit of jet lag and lack of filter, my response to someones sharing of all the things they were doing that were out of God's will was a simple....."STOP IT!" Every situation that was explained to me, the response was the same "STOP IT!"

As I think about it, it may seem harsh, but I know that the greatest gift my husband gave me when I was doing things that were clearly out of God's will was "Stop it!" From there, it's on me. I was told. So, I felt like sharing that same gift (along with other counsel...accountability partners, the Word of God, prayer) with my new neighbor.

Situations are different...addictions are tough, I know. BUT, sometimes, there are are situations where we just need to stop it and stop acting a fool!

*DISCLAIMER~ There is a good chance after I sleep for a few days, that I might re-think this post, but what's the fun in that. #SayItLikeYouMeanIt

"No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." 1 Corinthians 10:13 #Truth

I'm not sure, but the fact that I was watching this video the other week, may have contributed to my new counseling tips. Enjoy, have a laugh! and if you are doing something you shouldn't.... #StopIt

I love looking at before and after shots. Sometimes they are so drastic that I spend more time than is necessary trying to figure out if that really is the same person. You can see some similarities, but the transformation, most of the time through weight-loss, makes them look like a whole new person...on the outside.

As I was spending time in the Word of God today, I was struck by change. Jesus changed lives. When He touched them, they were never the same, sometimes on the outside, but mostly and most importantly on the inside. He cleansed the lepers, He drove out demons, he healed the sick, he raised the dead and HE FORGAVE SINS.

Through the past decade or so, I have gone though changes. I have lost weight drastically, but even though I looked really good, my heart was in a bad place. God changed my heart during that time, I gained weight back, but more importantly, I was brought back into a right relationship with Christ. He healed me.

Recently, I have put on a nice 40 pounds, which I am working to loose through balanced exercise and wise eating choices, but regardless I know where my heart and my trust lie.... In Christ Jesus.

I think about the times when I lacked discretion and I mad really poor decisions that almost destroyed my family, left me out on the street and separated me from fellowship with other believers.

I may have looked really good to some, but the reality is that I looked like this (see picture below) to my husband.

All those years ago, I lacked discretion, I made horrible choices, BUT GOD healed me. It is because of God's healing hand, redemption and forgiveness that I was able to begin to make wise choices, choices for life and not death, choices that allowed my husband to look at me and see the AFTER version of me in Christ.

Yes, drastic change. I am not who I was.
I am a child of God, an heir to the Kingdom of Heaven. 
I am a child of the King!

Who are you?
Do you know the truth about your identity?
If not, ask me and let me tell you about my Lord, let me tell you about YOU!

I used to be a really good liar and a really good cheater.....Then God changed my life. Now (by God's grace) I am horrible at it. When I am talking with my family and I (on the super rare occasion) tell a half truth, my family looks at me and asks if I am lying and I say "No, why?" to which they reply "look at your face." Then we just laugh because it's the most horrific poker face ever.....hence why I could never play cards.


I look at it like this. I used to be a hot mess. Now I'm just a mess. But when God changed my life, called me out of the darkness of my lies and self destruction, He also took away my ability to lie well. It's a gift and a curse, especially when someone asks who finished off the ice cream or who had three pieces of pie....oh and who ate the box of Oreos. That's when it really bites me in the butt.

But, for reelz, I count it as a blessing...... a reminder of what God has done in my life. I am not who I used to be. I am done with wearing fake masks, lying to those I love, sneaking around and just hiding the way I feel.

Do you ever get tired of wearing a mask or being so good at faking that you almost believe the lie yourself? Been there....Done that! When I submitted my life to Christ, He gave me the gift of being my own lie detector and I thank Him for it.

It has it's perks in that it keeps me accountable and it has it's down side in that people know exactly what I'm thinking and feeling by my facial expressions. I have had friends comment on numerous occasions that they can tell when I am not happy, when I am frustrated, when things make me cringe, but they also tell me that they know when I am happy, when I am grateful and when I am thankful. So I count it as a blessing.

My prayer is that God would do whatever He has to do to make us Holy in every situation. For me, He helps me not to lie and lets me get caught if I do.

I have been reading through the Bible and I was so deeply spoken to through the account of the Israelites leaving the Egyptians. Repeatedly God allowed and did things SO THAT the people and Pharaoh would know that He is Lord of all. God went to great lengths to show His people that He is God by taking them out of Egypt and into the wilderness and eventually the Promised Land.

"I will harden the hearts of the Egyptians so that they will go in after them. And I will gain glory through Pharaoh and all his army, through his chariots and his horsemen. The Egyptians will know that I am the Lord when I gain glory through Pharaoh, his chariots and his horsemen." Exodus 14:17-18

"And when the Israelites saw the mighty hand of the Lord displayed against the Egyptians, the people feared the Lord and put their trust in him and in Moses his servant." Exodus 14:31

I am thankful that God desires that we know Him and still today, will go out of His way to make sure we know that He is Lord. "He MAKES us lie down in green pastures and LEADS us beside still waters, He restores my soul"

We are works in progress, Holy and Redeemed, set apart and Loved.
#IamMyOwnLieDetector